2009
You are browsing the archive for 2009.
My Highly Subjective List of the Best Movies of 2009
I like going to the movies. I’m like Binx Bolling, but without the charming New Orleans accent. So as 2009 reaches the end of its reel, or, uh, one last delicious digitally-projected byte—oh shut up for god’s sake—I thought I’d run down the films I liked best. Now, as I’ve aged, I’ve become more suspicious […]
Eight Reasons You Haven’t Spotted Me On the Citizen’s Band
1. The indispensability of C.B. radio is greatly overblown. Off the top of my head, I know that my parents, grandparents, and great-grandparents don’t have handles, and neither does anyone at school (the kid who calls himself the Purple Turtle is such a liar). To reach any of these people, I just have to dial […]
Ten Reasons You Haven’t Spotted Me On Facebook
1. The indispensability of Facebook is greatly overblown. Off the top of my head, I know that my brother, sister-in-law, son, mother-in-law, father-in-law, next-door neighbor and work supervisor don’t have accounts and none are likely to anytime soon. To reach any of these people, I either have to take a very short walk or pick […]
Jersey Boys (State)
In my life, I’ve been generally well-regarded. With the distinct exception of one week in the summer of 1986. Prior to that, respect and acclaim followed me wherever I went. Mr. Skadden, my third-grade teacher at El Monte Elementary in Concord, California, dubbed me “Jack Armstrong, the All-American Boy.” In fifth grade at Candlewood Elementary […]
Wal-Mart in Covina
(from the LA Times)…Becky Willison, 31, of Covina was one of them, standing watch over a boxed Cabbage Patch Kids doll. She hoped to nab the $9 item for her 15-month-old daughter Mackensie because “it’s smushy,” she said. The former middle-school English teacher, who was laid off in June, saved $550 of her unemployment checks […]
Man Cave Update
Pretty light sentences, I would say.
I Was Willing To Give Mel Gibson Another Chance
Really, I was. Sure, there had been the anti-semitism and sexism, the homophobia, The Passion of the Christ, that Apocalypto piece of crap, and that crazy beard. I haven’t seen a Mel Gibson movie since Signs in 2002, and I only remember that it was awful, and there were glasses of water all over the […]
Cone-tributors
When people stop me on the street, they most often say, “Stop following me or I will call the police.” But their second-most frequent utterance is, “Boy, we sure enjoy the whimsical appearances of traffic cones on that Salty Wound blog.” The cone craze continues to spread, and my in-box has been flooded with submissions […]
Jack Silbert, curator