Emails Found on my Old Computer, Episode #4

Last night, seven and a half years later, I saw the same band at the same club. Could’ve sworn that had been a Valentine’s weekend show, but maybe that’s because the band, Higgins, handed out a CD in a Russell Stover heart box with chocolates inside. The chocolates and box are long gone, as are my mid-30’s, but I dug up the disc today, and was reminded of an e-mail I’d sent a friend that night. I never did hear from the girl in question….

7/19/04

met a weird chick tonight. One of the Tunes dudes was playing at Maxwells, but then it was raining like a mother, so i thought i’d stay home. But then it let up a little, and i did feel compelled to go to Benny’s—the guy let me eat free last week; he appreciated my honesty when I said that their chicken parm was merely OK. so i proceeded on to Maxwells. No Sop, no Curb, no Simp, no nothing, so what the hell. “Elysian Cafe” has reopened and it’s not as bad as I feared, but i must go inside and see the damage firsthand. Looks like they left the mural and the ceiling, i think. I hope. More windows. Looks similar but modernized a bit. Fancy tv screens. Back room is totally different, bathed in grey-blue light.

The Maxwells men’s room was also renovated. Nice new tile. But here’s the thing. I hope nobody has to shit, because the toilet is out in the open, and there’s no lock on the door.

Back room was empty—rain i guess—so i got me a Yuengling and sat down on the little bleachers to read. A Tunes dude eventually entered and sat with me. An OK-looking woman sat behind me to my right. During the opening band she asked me, is this the opening band? So clearly she wasn’t with one of the musicians. This is what I’ve learned from the rock shows. The women by themselves, they’re usually waiting for one of the guys on-stage. So i thought, at some point i’ll talk to her. My opening volley failed miserably. This giant dude in a giant red polo shirt was standing right in front of us for some time. (The other Tunes dude had stood up by now, leaving us alone on the bleachers, and she had moved so we were on the same level.) So i was thinking of a joke. Was gonna say “They should show movies on that guy’s back.” But ended up with the lamer “I could’ve stared at that guy’s back all night.” And she said, “But at least we have seats.” And I said, “mmmm.” And that was all for a while. But eventually we did begin chatting. She’s this lawyer-for-hire. Apparently these days, if Merck or Enron or whoever is getting sued, their law firm will hire 200 temp lawyers to review all their paperwork. She says the money is good, she can work a couple of months, take off a month or two, and then there’s always another gig.

So, it was weird, and Sal had described my deal perfectly a few years back: too wild for the straight girls, too straight for the wild girls. And this one I’d say is a straight girl, but maybe open-minded enough. Like, what the hell was she doing at Maxwells? She lives in Manhattan, and hadn’t heard of the main band. But she read about it in TimeOut and decided to check it out. WHo the hell knows. I walked her back to the PATH and gave her my card. Something about her seemed a little whacked out. Who knows. They’re all crazy. Was trying to figure out her age. She’s been in NYC for four years, she went to law school before that. Maybe 30? More? Nice face but had those little age lines that depress the shit out of me. [Former coworker] (who did not take me back to the empty apartment where she was staying) was still highly attractive, but was a highly-attractive 40, which is different.