Last night, sixty-six years and a day to the day from the attack on Pearl Harbor, a band of mercenaries, disguised as caterers and rock musicians, seized control of the USS Missouri, in order to steal its arsenal of nuclear weapons.
This stunning scenario took place on my television screen, as I passive aggressively watched “Under Siege,” while my wife tried to study for a math exam.
Steven Seagal is at his absolute best as the lowly cook/highly decorated former Navy SEAL whose brand of martial arts involves his opponent willingly giving up his wrist as an offering. From there, Seagal can usually gain the leverage to twist a few fingers and render his opponent ready for a final blast of fire, soup or knife to the throat, depending on their luck and past behavior.
Erika Eleniak plays an actress/model caught up in the madness. It is before she gained weight, appeared on the Biggest Loser, lost weight but will never look the same again. She pushes the boundaries of boyishness in a female lead in a major motion picture. She is very boyish. My wife thinks it’s homoerotic, for men who secretly want to fuck sailors. I think it’s a terrific turn.
Tommy Lee Jones makes an ass of himself as one of the villains. As the other, Gary Busey is as girlish as Erika Eleniak is boyish. Gary Busey dancing around in drag is one of the more memorable horrible turns in movie history. Even all these years later, Gary Busey would be justified in feeling his director did not protect him.
Jack Silbert, curator