Not Picking Up Your Dog’s Poop

It’s 2008, right? I mean, I know that’s not what it is according to certain other calendars (5768 according to the Jewish calendar) but generally we would all agree that we are in the 21st century. So why is it in this modern time that some of my neighbors haven’t gotten the memo that leaving your dog’s business on another person’s lawn is not just an infraction of city municipal codes, it’s just plain rude?

Amanda and I have tried to understand what type of person does this, and it still hasn’t quite come into focus yet. I wouldn’t put them in the same category as serial killers, yet they do -on some level- display similar sociopathic tendencies. The complete lack of regard for their fellow man and the absence of empathy or any notion of responsibility or guilt would seem to indicate that these people are fucked up. I mean, when you really think about it, how different is it from the offending neighbor himself just coming up and leaving a human “gift” on your lawn?

So after months of waking up and taking our own dog out to do his morning ritual only to find another dog’s presents gracing our lawn, I finally decided to put up a sign. An admittedly cliched act, BUT I did go out of my way to be positive and encouraging rather than blowing a gasket. In fact, I even included Eco-friendly poop bags on the sign and encouraged passersby to use one if they needed to. Guess what was awaiting me the next morning only five feet from the sign? Yep. Another pile of crap. I’m equal parts pissed off and intrigued by whoever is doing this, and I’ve considered pointing a hidden video camera out my window at night to catch them in the act. But then what would I do? Confront them like the “Dateline: To Catch A Predator” host does? Greeting them with a DVD of their offense in my hand and a stern lecture? Hardly.

Any suggestions?

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