Late Tuesday night, the New York Yankees effectively announced they were “all in” for the 2017 playoff chase by obtaining infielder Todd Frazier and pitchers David Robertson and Tommy Kahnle from the Chicago White Sox. It is hoped that Frazier, the New Jersey native and Rutgers graduate, will add some much needed pop and stability to the Yanks’ infield corners. Fans are wondering how he’ll split time with Chase Headley. But they are also wondering: What will radio-announcer John Sterling’s home-run call be for Todd Frazier? Compounding this question is the fact that Sterling already had to develop a HR call for Clint Frazier this season. (“And down-town goes Frazier!”) Salt in Wound humbly offers the following suggestions to the veteran play-by-play man:
— “Frazier hits a lazier to left!”
— “That’s a nice turn of Fraze: He turned on that one!”
— “Deep to left — into the deep freezier!”
— [sings:] “Oh baby I hear a home run calling, tossed helmets and rounded bags!”
— “Don’t stop it, Todd! He noogied that ball like it was Lisa Loopner!”
— “Todd-da!”
— “Todd goes yodd!”
— “Frazier enters the fray, as the ball enters the bleachers!”
— “To para-fraze the late Prince Rogers Nelson: Let’s go Fraziey!”
— “The fans were frazzled, till Frazier gave them a frisson!”
— “Freeze tag, anyone? Frazier tags it!”
— “A little Frazzle-dazzle!”
— “Forget Chicago, New York’s a Toddlin’ town!”
— “Todd drops an F-bomb into the left-field seats!”
— “Frazier reads them the Todd-Spanks Wall Street Reform and Consumer Protection Act!”
Previously featured:
• Starlin Castro
• Didi Gregorius
• Carlos Beltran
• Jacoby Ellsbury
• Brian McCann
• Kevin Youkilis
Jack Silbert, curator