3 stars out of 5
OK, here’s the deal. I was incredibly tired when I went to see Backrooms last week. As I sat down to write this review, I admitted to myself that I had dozed off sporadically in the second half of the movie, perhaps missing some key connections, so didn’t think I could fairly evaluate it. So yesterday, I went to see Backrooms again. And all I can say is… I WANT MY MONEY BACK!
I think I saw the trailer for Backrooms when I went to see the much superior Japanese film Exit 8. They seemed to be the same movie, and both seemed to basically be somebody lost in the Lumon Industries building. Oh, but I guess I’m supposed to pay special attention to Backrooms (looking like it’s set in an abandoned Levitz showroom) because director Kane Parsons, a.k.a. Kane Pixels (uggh whatever), is some kinda Gen Z online horror wunderkind who was signed by overrated studio A24 when he was only 16 years old.
His theatrical debut is about what I’d expect from a now-20-year-old: Pretty cool concept and visuals (yet all borrowed from the internet concepts of backrooms and “creepypasta” which date back to 2019) and some admittedly very strong sequences, but no deep understanding of the human condition required to deliver a really clever plot or emotionally complex characters. That screenwriter Will Soodik a.k.a. Willliam Bromell – because why use your own name? Idiots. – only has a background in TV makes sense; this movie seems slapped together from different segments that simply do not cohere.
The imprimatur and coffers of A24 allowed Parsons to cast top-tier actors: Chiwetel Ejiofor as a divorced furniture store owner, Renate “Sentimental Value” Reinsve as his therapist, Mark “Yeah I Used To Be a Wunderkind Too” Duplass as a paranormal scientist, and the girl from Shrinking as a store employee. Oh and she has a boyfriend who has resting Blue Steel face and, importantly, a Blair Witch video camera.
Parsons could’ve leaned into one of two not-super-original concepts here – divorce is hard; having a rough childhood is hard – and still come up with a nifty psychological horror. But there’s a big layer of “evil-corporate overlords” that just renders Backrooms stupid and nonsensical. It’s still watchable, mind you, as long as you’re well-rested.
Would have expected a lack of sleep to enhance the movie if anything. This is my permission to skip. I prefer my generation’s “mumble core”