By Jack Silbert on August 21, 2011
The British appreciate quality time pieces. (Just look at Big Ben.) And of course they’re huge Salt in Wound fans. (Though over there we’re known as Rogan-Josh-Mix-in-a-Blighty-One.com.) So it’s no surprise that my post on watches went positively viral on that side of the pond: http://www.precisiontime.co.uk/victorinox-swiss-army-is-only-watch-that-cuts-it-dna-921.html Now, that gushing bit of Silbophilia was published on […]
Posted in meta, satire | Tagged self-delusion, United Kingdom, watch repair
By Jack Silbert on April 27, 2011
Despite this morning’s release of President Obama’s long-form birth certificate, there are still so-called “birthers” who are demanding even further proof that the President was indeed born in Hawaii. To appease these critics, and hopefully put this discussion to bed once and for all, the White House has just released the following items. • Aloha-flower-print […]
Posted in satire | Tagged birthers, Hawaii, President Obama
By Jack Silbert on January 14, 2011
Shockwaves permeated the fabricated world of astrology yesterday, when the existence of Ophiuchus, a heretofore unknown, also-completely-made-up zodiac sign was announced. Panic ensued globally as people tried to cope with the new date ranges of the previously accepted 12 signs. Today, we’ve learned of the domino effect of this horoscope horror, impacting nearly all aspects […]
Posted in satire | Tagged astrology, Ophiuchus
By Jack Silbert on June 21, 2010
Fifty-seven minutes ago, the New York Times posted this Facebook status update: Sonia Sotomayor. John McCain. Patti Smith. Michelle Obama. Glenn Beck. Meryl Streep. John Grisham. Rachel Maddow. Read excerpts from their commencement speeches to the graduates of 2010. I have imagined what these excerpts might be. SONIA SOTOMAYOR: “You call THAT a gown?” JOHN […]
Posted in satire | Tagged commencement addresses, Facebook, New York Times, public figures
By Jack Silbert on June 12, 2010
It appears that John McCain has entered yet another election, this time under a false name that he feels will “really speak to the young people.”
Posted in satire | Tagged 70s TV shows, ageism, John McCain, separated at birth
By Jack Silbert on January 23, 2010
Hi Doctor Schneider! Or is it Doctor “Shneider”? Your email address in my in-box indicated the former, but your message steers me toward the latter: Did you receive the e-mail which I sent to you recently (copied here-below)?Please confirm since I have had problems lately with emails intercepted by spam-filters set too high.Cordially, Marc Shneider, […]
Posted in satire | Tagged meta, spam
By Jack Silbert on December 5, 2009
by Ogg 1. The indispensability of the wheel is greatly overblown. My club, my loincloth, cro-magnon woman—I can reach them all from where I’m crouching, in a pile of my own feces. So why would I possibly want to go over there? 2. If I did want to go over there—and to reiterate: I do […]
Posted in satire | Tagged putting off buying milk and bananas, quixotism
By Jack Silbert on September 19, 2009
My friend said he was attending a production of Hamlet at the Shakespeare Theatre of New Jersey. Sometimes the jokes write themselves. TAYLOR HAMLET by Billy Shakes • Dis ting, ovuh awl udduh tings: Be true t’ yuh’self. Capiche? • Lenduh? Borrowuh? F-ck dat, chief. • Frail? Wutt uh you, a woman? • Sumpin’ is […]
Posted in satire | Tagged New Jersey, Shakespeare
By Jack Silbert on September 17, 2009
7:42 a.m., Richland County Public Library 11:17 a.m., Greenlawn Memorial Park 3:28 p.m., Amtrak “Quiet Car” 10:04 p.m., Klan Rally
Posted in satire | Tagged politicians, Rep. Joe Wilson
By Jack Silbert on August 25, 2009
Hilarity ensues as John McCain moves in with the Drapers.
Posted in satire, separated at birth | Tagged John McCain, television
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